OPPORTUNITY WILL ONLY KNOCK ONCE

Evening all. Between working my day job and trying not to go insane in the studio I haven't had much spare time of late; so I'm making use of this "day off" (sort of) and making one or two last blogs before the summer holidays.

First of all, I did carry forward the theme of doors - went round a few streets and photographed as many as I could, then cropped them all on photoshop so they were more or less the same size.

and here they all are, sitting beautifully in a row. I made a couple of interesting composites out of them by editing all the doors into one image:

not really sure what possessed me to make these images but I must say I'm quite happy at the result; there's an ethereal kind of feel to them which I wasn't expecting. Raises questions too - what's behind the doors? is it there to keep us out? or to keep something in?

This train of thought is fairly relevant; for a long while I had just a tiny print of that white door from the installation room on my wall (see my earlier posts) - reflected pretty accurately how I felt; everywhere I looked there were doors closing on me, opportunities missed, inspiration that wouldn't come, trapped behind doors in the mind, locked by a lack of self-confidence. In this respect the door became something more sinister - it ultimately represented how trapped I felt. I would sit in my studio space or at home, deep in thought, staring at that door for hours. For a long time I didn't even pick up my camera, or work on anything arty. I had photographed and edited a whole series of doors, but my shitty state of mind wouldn't let me print them - and so I ended up wallowing in apathy, unsure of everything.

However, after the Easter holidays I finally managed to get my shit together long enough to actually print these images and stick them on my wall, and my tutors really loved them. This gave me the confidence to get my work moving again. Some advice from Michael, one of my tutors - "Just be aware of everything. The way the sun plays on the surface of a puddle, the shadow from a passing car, that person's surprisingly colourful shoes - let the world wash over you. Don't let a day go by when you haven't taken at least a hundred photographs of everything around you."

That's all the inspirational shite I have time for today unfortunately everyone; I am working on a new set of images based around the theme of "holes in things" - a start that is sort of related to my practice of observing things, but I plan to make it the first series of many that will basically document my experience as a human being, alive in the 21st century.

Keep it real people.

- Padfoot

A LEAP INTO THE IMPOSSIBLE

In my last post I was looking at some film artists, Pippilotti Rist and Jonas Mekas, who are just bloody brilliant to be quite honest. So I started trying to throw a bit of absurdity into my work. The solution came without any real preamble - essentially I was feeling a bit frustrated one day and decided to turn everything in my space upside down, including my desk and some of the prints on the wall. Some of these pictures looked much better upside down for some reason... so I photographed all the upside down-ness from my space.

When I got the prints back, I showed them deliberately flipped upside down:

I was surprised by how something as simple as turning an image upside down could cause it to be read completely differently; the inversion of the floor and ceiling causes confusion and the brain struggles to process the scene - which way is up?
Ideally I'd like to experiment with this a little further in the installation room with other furniture, and possibly get some people involved too.

Also to follow on from those photos of the bitches, I had a bash at getting some candid photos of people I met, or have a connection with somehow. I'm reasonably happy with them, but some of them lack a bit of oomph; they feel more like bog-standard snapshots than the kick-ass, chunky images laden with pathos that I was expecting. However, I guess that's up to the viewer's interpretation. The harshest critics we face in this life are ourselves after all.

Taking my feedback from my mid-term review into account, I'm gonna carry on with the spaces ideas. However I'm gonna try and broaden it; include film as well as photographs, and try not to force a concept onto it like I have been doing by turning them upside down. Observe everything, then edit backwards from there, picking out the "good bits". So I may end up with hundreds of photos or hours of video of nothing in particular, but be able to pick out or splice together lots of little moments, similar to "As I was Moving Forward...." by Jonas Mekas.
Also, I want to expand on the people shots - I've always thought I have an eye for portraits, but perhaps I need to work on it. I've been suggested to get right up in the face of my subject, maybe make them uncomfortable with the proximity of the camera... I'm not sure if I'll make any friends doing this, but it's definitely something I want to try.

Also... this door.

I keep seeing it and wondering if there's anything I can do to expand on it. Maybe photograph lots of doors? Would tie in nicely to the whole "observe everything" malarkey that I'm working on.

Well - that's me more or less set up for a few weeks I'd say. Let's rock n' roll.

- Padfoot

EYEBALL MASSAGE

Part of the whole of this second year thing on my course is all about trying to identify what my practice actually is. Not necessarily what it does, but what is the context of it? Well, I think I'm on the way to finding myself in that respect. I've found that I have a talent for observation; my work is a phenomological exploration, recording the world around me, and sometimes putting my own twist on it. I've also found that I'm drawn to humourous works, the strange and psychedelic, imaginative or unique processes (such as Dave McKean's photocopied collage comic strips) and pure absurdity. These qualities tend to stand out to me when I view an artist or their work.

With these in mind, these are some of the people I've been looking at recently.

PIPPILOTTI RIST - EYEBALL MASSAGE

With a name as strange as her work, Rist mainly works with video, presenting many visual wonders in her latest show at the Hayward Gallery, "Eyeball Massage". Often her work involves various manipulations of video, mainly playing with speed of playback, or crossfading two or more separate videos together to make a film-based collage of video and sound. 

This video shows a few excerpts from the works that were on show at the Hayward.

If there was ever an artist who represented the absurd, Rist is most definitely one of them. The sometimes insane subject matter of her work (smashing car windows with a flower, for example) and over-saturated, sickly sweet colours gives the impression of Rist living in a dream world, or perhaps documenting a dream, representing or acting out juxtapositions and the fantasies that the human condition throws up in the face of authority - ie, the destruction/vandalism of the cars, but using a flower, something that is inherently delicate.

JONAS MEKAS - AS I WAS MOVING AHEAD, OCCASIONALLY I SAW BRIEF GLIMPSES OF BEAUTY

Mekas is hailed by some as being a key influence in their film making career, and the "godfather of American avant-garde cinema". The works I have looked at are purely observational; Mekas was recording moments of his life since 1949, a few weeks after he emigrated to America. In the piece "Brief Glimpses" (video below) some of these moments are seen; holidays, family gatherings, people in the street, walks through countryside - all randomly spliced together, varying speeds and durations.

Watching this I feel as if I am being granted an exclusive glimpse into the memories of Mekas; the random splicing and sometimes chaotic nature of the editing make the clips similar the way recalling memories or dreams can be disjointed and sometimes fuzzy. This makes the work deeply personal, you almost feel as if you are invading his privacy by watching. As Mekas himself explains in the video, he initially intended to put the clips together chronologically, but eventually "gave up", giving way to randomness and chaos, saying that he "does not truly know where any part of [his] life truly belongs" - this further emphasises the video representing the act of remembering; Mekas is now an old man and has had many experiences, so it is likely he has trouble recalling exactly what happened where, despite these recordings. Saying this, who can truly pick out every single significant event of their lives from memory and describe it in vivid detail? Of course, some stand out more than others; human long-term memory is a powerful phenomenon. But not everything can be stored.

Think I might have to try some of these things; I haven't really done an awful lot of work with film. Might be time to try something a little different.

- Padfoot

THOSE BITCHES

As mentioned before, I've been working on getting together some random candid shots of people I have a connection with, and playing with the narratives/stories they suggest.

The most obvious example is the people I live with - a minor disagreement that has blown up into us basically not talking to each other, and the emotions and passions that have been expressed as a result, led me to try and photograph them; I figured that this might produce some interesting results. However, because of the current situation this has been remarkably difficult... near on impossible, in fact. 

I did manage to get some pictures of them, whilst they were fairly drunk at a club night and temporarily forgot that we were mortal enemies. Having said that, chances are they didn't even know it was me taking the photos.

Despite this, I confess that I feel no pleasure having taken these. I thought that doing this might help channel my negative feelings for these two girls into something creative; I was hoping to make a contrast between how I feel about them and how they look in the photograph, eg: the title may be something along the lines of "that bitch I have to live with", but in the photograph she might look serene and beautiful. But there is most certainly no contrast here. And frankly, I feel like I have sunk to their level by engaging in an activity as openly spiteful as this.

Time for a change of plan I think.

- Padfoot

GAIETY IS THE MOST OUTSTANDING FEATURE OF THE SOVIET UNION

...Or so we would be led to believe at any rate, according to our good friend Josef Stalin and the title of the Saatchi's latest exhibition, combining the work of some post-USSR Russian artists together into one show. I visited this show on Thursday 7th February; and I'm pretty sure that the show runs until the beginning of May... so if you haven't seen it yet, it's definitely worth a look.
The photography of Boris Mikhailov and Sergei Vasiliev stood out for me personally; of course, I may be slightly biased, there were some other pretty kickass sculptures / installations but I think these guys are the most relevant to my stuff.

The intimacy of these shots, the unparalleled control that each photographer holds over his subjects lends great power to the images. Mikhailov's section was dominated by "Case History" (1997-98), a selection from a series of over 400 shots, a photojournalistic documentation of the abandoned working class in the city of Kharkov after the dismantling of the Soviet Union 10 years previous. Mikhailov traded hot meals for utter control over his subject, often showing nudity or unusual poses - some of these point out in gruesome detail the physical suffering of these people; often the subjects are undernourished, have severely damaged teeth or various sores on their skin.

Sergei Vasiliev's subjects were rather different however - his photographs document a secret language of tattoos used by Russian Soviet prisoners, a set produced between 1989-93. The interesting thing about these images is that they appear to be isolated shots pulled from a bog-standard tattoo magazine. However as the narrative behind their creation is revealed, the work changes, evolves into a gritty documentation of resistance within the prison system's culture of repression.

This raw, intimate style ties in quite nicely with some of my own work I have been producing recently - I've been trying to unconsciously photograph people I meet or have a connection with. It has been a little difficult working out how best to get candid photos of people without them noticing, although I have found using my phone on silent and without flash can produce some good results. Of course, the fact that I can't use my camera is absolutely killing me, but since the autofocus is buggered, it's just not quick enough to be able to capture those little moments that can be lost to hesitation. I'll put them up on a separate post when I've got some good ones together.

Until then however, I must bid you adieu. Night all.

- Padfoot

INSTAGRAM WANKER

...is my new title, apparently. But then, not everyone on Twitter should be taken seriously. Don't even know why I have the bloody thing...

But I digress. First of all, holy shit its 2013 already - so much to do and so little time. Critical and Cultural studies has to be uh... studied, my studio practice needs to keep moving, I need to get myself a placement, a dissertation proposal of 1,500 words has to be written... 

This is going to be bloody insane.

Speaking of studio practice, here's some my latest work shot with - you guessed it - that infamous photography app, Instagram. 

Instagram and I have something of a love-hate relationship going on here. On the one hand, I love how I can quickly and easily produce some rather tasty looking photos and share them with the world. On the other, I hate how it makes me sift through hundreds of crap photos of someone's breakfast in order to find a good picture, and how it can instantly digitally reproduce analogue techniques or media that take years to master. 

Having said this however - what can be defined as "good" and "shit" is extremely open to interpretation these days.... maybe these people are the next wave of modern artists, elevating the dish of breakfast to an all new social and cultural platform. Does Instagram and other modern technology devalue the art of the photograph? Or is it just me being elitist? 

Say. That sounds like a good dissertation title. AWESOME.

I did print those negatives in the end, and they shall be uploaded as soon as I can get them back from my assessors. I wrote on the negs, scribbled on them, scratched them. Some of the results were quite effective, but most of them were very obvious - it was quite clear that I had overthought the production of the prints, and according to my tutors my more ambiguous works are much better. Say for example, that photo of a door from the Empty series:

Despite it's practically "empty" subject matter, there's so much going on in that photo - you can attach a number of different narratives to it, and even though it is merely a banal white door against a white wall, there is something unnerving about it - part of the reason why I photographed it in the first place.

So I'm going to do some more of these "empty" photographs. Although I'm gonna stick to people I think; keep it free and spontaneous, and maybe attach a narrative to the photos. Should be interesting to see what kind of juxtapositions I can achieve - for example, a sneaky photo of someone I don't get on with could end up looking quite serene and flattering. 

But enough waffling. I must go; my planet needs me.

Keep it metal y'all.

- Padfoot

OBLIGATORY CHRISTMAS POST

Merry Christmas, you 'orrible lot.

Sorry I've been so quiet lately, various things have been going on meaning I haven't been in a brilliant mental state and as such I haven't been able to make any new work for a while. But I've been lying dormant for too long - I'm one of those people who can't stay quiet forever.

First of all, some excellent news - I entered some of my photographs into an open submission call for Cork Street Gallery in London, and one of my old Polaroids from Berlin, Holocaust Memorial II, made it to the shortlist. It might not actually get hung in the final show, but it will still be in the gallery's catalogue and I've got complimentary tickets to the private view - and that's some seriously good exposure. Plus I'll be netting a tasty wad of cash if I manage to sell the piece.

I'm also looking in to a photography internship with Brick Lane Gallery; they need someone to document their shows. I still need to figure out if it's feasible in terms of travel and fitting it in around my course and cinema job, but I think it'll be invaluable experience.

So as I said, not an awful lot has been going on in terms of creativity recently; I have been focusing on just being with my family for the Christmas period. However before the semester ended, I did put on a one day show; a collaborative project with several of my fellow students called In This River - basically, it consisted of plaster limbs poking out of a shallow river running through Stanborough Park, near Welwyn Garden City. Partly inspired by the engravings of Gustav Dore seen in Dante's Divine Comedy, it was produced for one my course modules.

I did start working with text more as well - I've been doing a lot of writing, mostly improvised scribblings on whatever was to hand at the time, very stream of consciousness style.

I still need to do that typewriter experiment with the massive ream of paper. But alas, it would appear that the bloody things are not easy to come by. And everyone selling them want shitloads of money for courier delivery, since Royal Mail don't like lugging around heavy boxes. I am determined to get one though... even if I have to borrow one from a charity shop or something.

I also started to play with writing on my negatives as a way of incorporating text into my images. One piece I made that created an interesting reaction was a photo of Harold Shipman, with MURDERER / SAVIOUR written across it.

When I presented it in a critique, a heated discussion followed on whether I genuinely thought that Shipman, widely recognised as a bit of a douchebag because of all the patients he illegally euthanised, was a "saviour". The idea of the piece was to examine this dichotomy; was he murdering the patients, or saving them from their pain? Ultimately, I believe he was a murderer - I support the idea of euthanasia, but Shipman did it for monetary gain rather than to prevent the suffering of his patients. While I was surprised by the reactions I got, I was also pleased - but then again, by hijacking an existing image of a person I know people to dislike, just to get a reaction - I feel like I was kind of cheating. Either way, definitely want to do more of this stuff... I still have a lot of negatives to print anyway so I'm looking forward to having a bit more time in the darkroom to experiment.

Anyways I had best punch out and get some shuteye before I fall asleep on my laptop - been a long few weeks.

Merry Christmas y'all.

-Padfoot